The chaos surrounds me. Life whizzing by 1000 miles a minute. The task list for today lays before me. Decisions to be made on exactly which ones will be completed, for not all of them can. The stress of the load is almost more than I can bare. I remember something I forgot yesterday. A voice that sounds more like a drill sergeant piercing my mind saying “Get up!” “You’ve got this!”. I forcibly make myself take a step of movement toward something, anything that will complete a task list item. I robotically complete my day and fall into the bed so mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted yet dreading sleep because tomorrow brings the same. 

It is hard for me close my eyes and remember those days. But in the same breath oh how I praise God that those days are a memory and no longer a reality. Oh how I praise God that He gave me the desire to seek Him. How He gave me the courage to follow Him. How He gave me the faith to trust in His plan. How He has been with me even when I felt nothing. How He has healed me of wounds I didn’t even know affected me. How He is faithful to remind me of all of the above when I can’t seem to find my way. 

I was talking with my mom this morning, oh how I cherish the talks we have. Our openness. How we can be vulnerable with one another, have disagreements yet still be able to talk through it. It wasn’t always like it is now. It took time. It took growth. It took a desire – to know one another more. It took grace to hear each other’s hearts without internalizing it. It took courage to talk about the things we didn’t want to. It took establishing a firm foundation with God to find a firm foundation with one another. I’m thankful. Relationships are important. God has a plan for each and every relationship you have. Each and every relationship you form. Each and every one. We were talking this morning that back when I walking through the chaos, if God would have handed me a 10 year plan, I would have been so overwhelmed that I would have crumbled in fear. I probably would have been like, no thank you, I’m good. But you know, I’m thankful that God knows each of us so personally, He did create each of us after all. He knows exactly what each of us needs, each and every day. The overwhelming reason we suffer through chaos, in my opinion, is that we just don’t seek to hear what God would have us do next. So relationships remain troubled, life remains bogged down, minds remain a whirl wind of thoughts….meanwhile God patiently awaits our asking “What do you desire me to do Lord?”. When we take this approach with every aspect of our lives, day by day, not worrying about the 10 year plan, we discover that day by day God leads us to a clearer path. His path. We become part of His mission. We help one another find the one true answer, God.

Read through these verses – verses that teach us about listening to God. When one of them resonates within you, trust God and pray that scripture back to God. Ask Him to help you. He patiently awaits.

https://www.openbible.info/topics/listening_to_god

Father I pray that you grow our desire to seek you. I ask that you increase our faith to step where you would have us step. I pray that when fear tries to creep in that your love would pour over us like a fresh shower, washing every impurity from our surface, allowing us to experience your cleansing. Amen